july 16, 2023

July 16, 2023

11:15 am

Stay calm and swim on.  

That is what I am doing and what I will do.

I am alive today….I am well today….I can get out of bed and walk; I can breathe; I can think and pray and speak; I have nutritious food and I can eat.  

I am alive today.

I read online of my highschool classmates’ son-in-law, Steven Louis Stopper, Jr., who died in an accident on July 12. He was 37 years old and leaves behind his wife of nine years, Danielle, my classmates’ daughter, and an 18-month-old baby boy, Ryker.

None of us know when the time will come, but we are all going to leave this Earth one day.  Every single one of us.  

I’d always wanted and believed and felt that I would live to be at least 100 years old, and I still want and believe and feel that.  I have a lot of living and loving left.

The truth of the matter is that the nature of precious life on this precarious journey is that….nothing is guaranteed…not one more day, for sure.  It seems quite cruel to me….I cannot say I understand….I have many more questions than answers….

But I am a logical realist….and that is just the way it is.

I am also a believer in Jesus, who designed me and brought me into this world…I had not a thing to do with it….for His own purpose and plan….and I will live out that purpose and plan to the best of my ability and knowledge….though severely limited!....for as long as….my days are appointed here on this planet…in this realm…and then…I….by “I” I mean my spirit, my soul, my essence….will…transcend to the next…..realm…to Heaven, for I am a believer and I want to be reunited with my Creator to walk with Him for eternity.  

I desperately do not want to leave my Laura and my Dave and my grand-dude, Ead.  The thought is unbearable…..

I have become very unimpressed with humanity and I have become very disgusted with the evil that haunts this planet and preys about….and yet at the same time, I am completely entranced by the beauty in nature here, and am so very grateful to be able to live in such a lovely, lovely place!!!!

I am not afraid for my body to fail and die, for one day it surely will…that is a guarantee….I am not afraid, for that is God’s natural will and plan…and I am not afraid…I look forward to meeting Jesus….

But I cannot bear the thought of leaving my sweet Laura….my Dave….my Sunshine….

But…I am alive & kicking today!  And I will not think of those things today!